Industry and audience essay feedback and learner

1) Copy and paste your feedback from the email in full - WWW, EBI and LR.

Audience essay feedback:

WWW:

·         You’ve delivered a 500 word essay – just! – and offered some excellent points, particularly on the film/TV industries and news.

·         You’ve clearly picked out some key points from the lessons and notes such as the impact of streaming and citizen journalism.

·         You’ve offered a really good opinion in your introduction that acknowledges both sides of the argument. This is an excellent sign.

EBI:

·         I think you could have offered a bit more here overall in terms of word count – particularly if you’re aiming for that 7+ grade! If you just go for the bare minimum it’s unlikely you’ll reach those top grades so one to consider in future.

·         Clearer sentence structure – keep an eye on spelling, grammar and word choice. Read your conclusion back as an example – it’s pretty much all one sentence (an 85 word sentence!)

·         In an academic essay, try and avoid using subheadings and instead write excellent topic sentences – a clear sentence at the start of the paragraph that focuses on the question and develops your argument.

LR:

·         Complete the LR tasks on the GCSE Media Year 1 blog – Audience and Industry essay feedback LR

2) What was the word count for your essay?

504 words.

3) What was your strongest paragraph? Why do you think it was better than others?

My strongest paragraph is the film and television industry as i have stated all my points clearly and made a clear argument.

4) What was your weakest paragraph? Why do you think it wasn't as good as others?

My weakest paragraph was the conclusion as all i dine was just repeated mt points when i could have added more point to back my argument up.

5) How can you improve your extended writing in GCSE Media Studies in future?

I could state more points and use a clear sentence structure.

6) Write ONE thing you have learned about the internet, audience and industry from completing this essay.

That the internet allows citizens to also be journalists.

Extension task

Research one of the three industries (music, film/TV, news) and find statistics and quotes that link to how the audience experience of that industry has changed as a result of the internet. For example, social media has now overtaken TV as the main news source for young people - showing how power is shifting in the news industry away from traditional institutions (full details in this BBC news article). 

People mostly use Facebook for looking at news and 27% of Norway pay for news.
  

 "cannot afford to ignore social media, especially if they want to reach young people and women"

"In doing so, they risk losing control of content and that relationship with the reader which can drive them to other content, so they have to balance using social media platforms with building up a loyal user base of their own,"